Spill It

Why Gossiping is Crucial to Society.

Gossip: (noun) casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true.

To be called a gossip is to be classified as someone with so little substance, you must resort to maliciously whispering about others for entertainment. It’s a common derogatory term reserved for that backstabbing little bitch, whether she’s fifteen or fifty. Hell, even the Bible advises us to avoid the common blabbermouth in Proverbs 20:19.

But this common insult does not encompass the entire definition of the word “gossip”, or casual conversation involving details unconfirmed as being true. Frankly, I’m sick of pretending gossip is this horrible activity that’ll get you blacklisted from Heaven instead of a crucial pillar of society. I’ll cut the foreplay: here’s why gossip isn’t just a conventional activity, but an irreplaceable aspect of social relationships.

First and foremost, gossip helps build and reinforce social bonds by facilitating trust and shared understanding. As someone who spent twelve years at an all-girl school, I can testify that some of my closest friendships arose from a shared dislike for a teacher or classmate. I’m certain many can relate and have experienced how a common enemy births friendship, or even how a whispered admiration for someone creates social bonds based on similar interests. According to a 2022 BBC article:

“Whenever someone confides something to you about someone you both know— whether the information is positive, negative, or neutral—it brings the two of you closer, creating a social bond.” (Waddington, 2022).

Gossip, good or bad, is a tried and tested method of finding like-minded people with whom to form societal ties. Have you ever sparked up a conversation based on a teacher’s rumored tests of ungodly difficulty, or wondered if a cute girl has a boyfriend or not? Even if we don’t realize it, a lot of our everyday conversations are founded on unconfirmed truths, or in other words, gossip.

Specifically, we spend an average of 52 minutes per day gossiping, according to a 2019 University of California study. This tendency to provide and seek out information is proven to be a large aspect of daily life, and one that helps us navigate social landscapes. No matter how we frame it or under what guise, gossip is an undeniably important aspect of creating social bonds.

Moreover, gossip can be beneficial for mental health and conflict reduction because it allows individuals to vent emotions. Referring to the aforementioned BBC article, “Gossip is a way of expressing emotions, both positive and negative, a way of 'letting off steam' and an emotional reaction to perceived social injustice” (Waddington, 2022), a fact I too can attest to.

I began seeing my psychologist in eighth grade to deconstruct and digest my social issues at the time, and I still see her now and then. For 60 precious minutes, I’m allowed to vent about the girl who’s making my life impossible. While my actions could be classified as gossip by definition, they’re also the only thing between me and the emotional outburst in which I’d call said girl a bitch to her face. In that scenario, I would’ve hurt both others and my reputation.

The same goes for conversations that aren’t protected by HIPAA, like the nasty comments my best friend reserves for a phone call regarding a boy. In certain situations, gossip isn’t the bad guy, but the needed release to keep us from falling apart. Frankly, it might be what keeps us sane. When approached mindfully, gossip can serve as a valuable emotional outlet and a tool for maintaining social balance.

In addition, gossip serves as a form of whistleblowing that helps expose unethical behavior, thereby promoting accountability and fostering cooperation. According to the National Institutes of Health and the Royal Society of London, “Gossip can be used to indirectly punish or indirectly aggress against (non-cooperative) targets by imposing reputational costs on them”, furthermore, “Gossipers share information about others' (un)trustworthiness (e.g. about norm violations) that is essential in selecting cooperative partners and avoiding free-riders, thus ensuring future cooperation.” (Dores Cruz).

On a smaller scale, this theory plays out in everyday situations: if there’s a boy in my Statistics class who’s infamous for never participating in group projects, you best believe everyone will be avoiding him like the plague in hopes of getting an A.

On a more serious note, gossip helps expose unethical behavior and become collective action, as seen in the #MeToo Movement. What began as rumors evolved into a widespread exposé of sexual harassment and abuse, ultimately becoming a global call for accountability and improvement. In this way, gossip can function not just as idle talk but as a tool for social

regulation and transformative change.

Finally, it's important to note that gossip has been utilized as a form of communication and social justice, not just today, but for millennia. In Ancient Greece, for instance, it allowed women to gain power in the absence of legal rights. Meanwhile, in 18th-century Britain, it became a form of knowledge and influence for marginalized groups. Although frowned upon by many, gossip has long been a key feature of society.

To wrap things up, gossip is far more than a mean girl’s malicious whispers. It’s a deeply embedded and historically significant form of human communication that strengthens societal bonds, provides emotional catharsis, and promotes accountability.

But that’s not to say it’s inherently good. It can be easily weaponized, such as during the European Witch Hunts, where rumors led to the deaths of thousands of innocent women. Its overlap with the civil wrong of slander also reminds us of its potential to harm, and we’re quite literally warned against it in the Bible.

My point is that, like money, politics, or any other powerful social force, gossip is neutral. What matters is how we choose to wield its power. Considering its enduring presence across the ages and the globe, I feel confident saying that it’s not just an inevitable phenomenon, but an essential one. Instead of condemning it in all its shapes and sizes, perhaps it’s time we start understanding and appreciating the many roles gossip plays in shaping society.

Love,

Bibliography:

Dores Cruz, Terence D., et al. “Gossip and Reputation in Everyday Life.” Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society of London. Series B, Biological Sciences, U.S. National Library of Medicine, 22 Nov. 2021, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8487731/.

• This peer-reviewed study explores how gossip functions as a mechanism for enforcing social norms by punishing unethical behavior through reputational consequences. The essay uses this source to support the claim that gossip encourages accountability and cooperation, linking it to whistleblowing and movements like #MeToo.

“Gossip Was a Powerful Tool for the Powerless in Ancient Greece: Aeon Ideas.” Aeon, https://aeon.co/ideas/gossip-was-a-powerful-tool-for-the-powerless-in-ancient-greece. Accessed 29 Apr. 2025.

• This article discusses the historical and cultural significance of gossip, particularly how marginalized groups such as women in Ancient Greece used it as a form of power and communication. The essay draws on this source to argue that gossip has been historically instrumental in giving voice to the powerless.

“The History of Gossip Columns.” Shondaland, https://www.shondaland.com/shondaland-series/bridgerton/the-history-of-gossip-columns. Accessed 29 Apr. 2025.

• This article explores the evolution of gossip columns and their role in shaping public opinion and celebrity culture. Although not cited directly in the main body of the essay, it complements the argument by reinforcing the cultural entrenchment and social influence of gossip, particularly in 18th-century Britain.

Waddington, Kathryn. “The Surprising Benefits of Gossip.” BBC News, BBC, 11 Aug. 2022, https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20220804-the-surprising-benefits-of-gossip.

• Written by a psychology expert, this article outlines the emotional and social benefits of gossip, such as bonding, stress relief, and emotional expression. The essay references it multiple times to reinforce points about gossip being a bonding agent and a healthy emotional outlet.

Warren, J.D. “Study Busts Myths about Gossip.” University of California, 7 May 2019, https://www.universityofcalifornia.edu/news/study-busts-myths-about-gossip.

• This study provides empirical data showing that people spend an average of 52 minutes a day gossiping, most of which is neutral in tone. The essay uses this statistic to demonstrate how common and normalized gossip is in everyday life, supporting the claim that it is a fundamental part of human interaction.